Refocusing

When I first started this blog, I think that I wanted this to be the end-all, be-all blog for me.  However, I just don’t think that’s me.  Reviews, and recipes, and books, and dating, and musings — oh my!  Too much.

Being a true capricorn, I’m feeling the need to reorganize and refocus, because everything has its place.  Trust me, I know how ridiculous and structured (and anal retentive) this sounds to have everything in different places, but it works for me.  If I told you how many blogs I have, you wouldn’t believe me.

I think that I really want this blog to focus far less on food reviews, since I already do that separately.  I don’t need to write book reviews right now — I’m trying to write books that I can publish!  Rather, I want this blog to be similar to the first one I ever wrote.  It was on Xanga, and it was purely an organic group of posts about whatever came to mind.  Experiences, observations, musings, dating, reactions, and diatribes.  Rants every now and then.  Maybe even my reaction to an amazing recipe once in a while.  But rarely.

Do you ever find that sometimes you need to completely express something that’s on your mind before you can really focus on the task at hand?  I know that I do.  And it’s so necessary, because whatever that thought is, it will nag at me until I do something with it — like a dull headache that lingers until I finally break down and take an Advil.  A dear friend of mine, way back from Xanga days reminded me of the kind of blogging I used to do, and how I used to really be willing to “go there.”  She reminded me how much I missed that writing, and how much I’ve begun to censor myself.  Well, no more.

It’s back to the writing therapy that I need to get out my thoughts and clear the clutter from my mind so that I can focus on whatever writing project I’m working on at the moment.  If I ever want to get these novels published, it’s time to get a little more serious.

Welcome to the mind purge of Simone Marrise.

The Ever Elusive

Do you know those guys who find you online, who say they think you’re beautiful and that you seem like a cool person to get to know?  Oh yeah, and then they tell you that they’re not actually looking for anything beyond friendship.  Maybe they recently got out of something serious, or they just know they aren’t ready for serious.

Whatever the case, you sort of got your hopes up until he said that final piece.  And because you met online, now you feel no rush to actually meet him in person.  He’s that guy that texts you when he’s sick and wants to see if you’re free to bring him some soup, or the one who’s always heading out of town, so he has to cancel that dinner that you finally set up because you’re tired of having an acquaintance rather than a friend.

Obviously, I know such a guy.  I’ve known him now for about 8 months, and every time we set things up (truly with the best intentions), plans always fall through.  Normally, I’d just give up on someone like this, just because I really can’t stand flaky behavior.  But, for whatever reason, I find myself wondering why we get along so well when we actually do talk; how is it that he always understand?  Is he SURE he isn’t really ready to pursue anything with anyone?  Maybe he doesn’t really KNOW he’s ready.

No, no, NO.  I have to remind myself sometimes that they really are that simple.  If he wanted something, he’d say so.  If we were going to hang out and the stars aligned our schedules, we’d meet up.  In the meantime, don’t waste your time thinking about this guy.  He’s taken himself out of the equation, and you should too.